Pros and Cons

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So, being a stay-at-home mom and wife can have its challenges. I’ve been in the business for only 6 months and let me tell you… IT IS NOT EASY! As I try to keep my sanity,  I started a list of some Pros and Cons of being in this line of work that at least applies to me … (By the way, to all the well-established SAHM out there… I salute, admire, envy and aspire to be like you!) This is how it feels for me right now. I know it is a case-to-case basis and so… I want to present my case…

PROS:

  1. Quality time with my spouse and children

 – My husband works at home most of the time therefore, gives us an opportunity to be together.  I am able to get the kids ready for school, see them eat breakfast, take them to and from school, run errands, and  just be home with them.  I know for that, I am truly blessed.

2. No boss

– At least my new “bosses” can’t fire me!

3. No work to worry about or bring home

– Okay, so this is something big for me.  As a teacher I worry about work 24 hours a day, 365 days per year.  I always have work to take home, lesson plans to make, materials to prep, papers to check, grades to be done.  Even in my sleep I feel that I worry about how my day is going to be!  It’s this part of teaching that I could honestly say did not enjoy as much.

4. Since I have kids who all go to school… there’s usually moments to myself

– I know I should not complain but sometimes the quietness can also be lonely. I miss the noise and chaos of all the kids and being in the classroom.

5. More time to prepare good meals

– We were used to so many Trader Joe’s meals when it was just us three… Now, I am able to make breakfast and supper for the whole family.  It’s the meal planning that is now racking my brains!  It is soooo hard to think of meals every single day.  I envy the mommy blogs I read that makes all these seem too easy.

6. Read

– I never had really much time to read before.  If I am not working or at home doing more work during school days and on weekends doing chores or taking the kids out with, I prefer to just relax, eat and watch Netflix.

7. Chance to learn new hobbies

– After going through the internet reading about stay at home moms, I realized that I never really have any hobbies!  It’s hard to even start anything because I am not the creative type of person.  It even took me a while to try my hand at blogging because I don’t consider myself a writer.

CONS:

1. Laundry, cleaning, housework, etc….

– I am going to be honest… sometimes it is just not fun at all! I do like a clean home but I also am not a neat freak.  We have 4 kids and keeping a house “spick-and-span” can have its challenges.  House is nicely mopped and clean the whole morning then as soon as everybody is at home… yeah… that’s all I have to say.

2. Too much alone time

– I guess I’m not just used to it.

3. No work = no pay

– It’s really not practical for me to be working and it took a while for me to accept and understand this fact.  My family, more importantly, my husband needs me to be home.  But being used to earning something to not somehow had its psychological effect on me.

4. Less social interactions

– Only because we moved half across the country from a very busy city (NY and MD) to where we are now… small rural town in Oklahoma. If I had all my friends close by… maybe it would be different.

5. Psychologically and emotionally frustrating

-For me, it is the culmination of all the changes that is happening that makes me feel this way.  Change can be difficult.  It is frustrating and sometimes depressing. You question your self, your sense of worth, purpose, and get to a point where you loose yourself in the process.

I feel like a fresh college student who is trying not to drown finding their self out in the real world.

There are times when I am so fulfilled by the thought of being able to take care of my family but there are also times when I feel I have no purpose. I know I am not alone in this ordeal. One way or another someone has felt and is feeling the same way I am feeling right now… taking on a different role… moving… changing careers… learning who they are in this whole new world they are now living in.

What to do?  I still don’t know.  For now the only way I could think of is to … Ride it out, step out of my box and try my hand at something, be thankful and pray for God’s grace. Believe somehow and someway EVERYTHING will work out and I will soon find myself once again…

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